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Hello! Normally this would be Make-It-Monday but given the current situation I decided to step away from that and talk about last weeks VMAs. I realize I am probably late on this band wagon because to tell the truth I did not watch the VMAs. I don't usually watch award shows. I didn't see the Miley Cyrus performance, although I have seen pictures. I think it would be impossible to be completely ignorant of it unless you we're an agoraphobic hermit with no electronic devices.

For a week I kept quiet, but since this doesn't seem to be going away anytime soon I felt I should speak. I am going to start by saying I am not defending her in any way. She made the choice (in my opinion a bad choice) to do that performance and she will have to live with the consequences. However, as a parent I feel that there are a few things that strike me as a parent.

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First, Miley Cyrus did not put that show together on her own. Someone (actually let's be realistic probably several someones) had to approve that. There we're costume makers, choreographers, light and sound people, the people in charge of the VMAs had to know what was coming. She didn't get up on stage and perform that for the first time that night. There we're practices and dress rehearsals and no where along the way did someone stop and say "no, this is too much, this is wrong"? Of course they didn't because they new it would be a scandal they new it would mean lots of press for the VMAs and they knew that next year more people will tune in to see if anything crazy will happen.

Because that is the society we live in. We live in a society where bad behavior is excused as self-expression. Where being a good role model doesn't get you ahead it gets you lost in the crowd. I mean think about it. Think of all those entertainment magazines and trash newspapers with headlines screaming at you from the aisle at the supermarket. Do they ever say "(so and so kind to waitress" or "actress wears appropriate clothing" or "actor behaves well at social gathering"? Of course not! Because that is not interesting!

I am raising my girls in a society that exploits and exalts bad behavior. Especially bad behavior of young women. Now, I personally try not to rant about how society exploits the sexuality of women because I feel like that has been happening since the dawn of time and it's a poor excuse for bad behavior.

Also, I would like to point out that that child (yeah, Miley Cyrus) has been in the spotlight since she was 14. Rarely has that turned out well for any child actress/singer. I remember a few years ago. Right around the Party in the USA pole dancing mishap. DH and I had our nieces come stay with us at Christmas. Now, not having kids the right age we had never seen the Hannah Montana show but being a good aunt and uncle we let the girls stay up late and binge watch the first season on Netflix.

I will never forget the conversation my husband and I had during that first episode. Miley came bouncing onto the screen and this weird look came over my husbands face. He looked a little confused so I said "she's been playing Hannah Montana since she was 14, this is an old episode." My husband looked at me with a disgusted look on his face and said "I know! Look at her outfit and the way she moves. Her dad really did know what he was selling even then huh? How could you do that to your kid?"

Now, like I said Miley Cyrus has made her own bad choices, but every time I see her name splashed across the news I think of that. I think of myself as a parent. Knowing the society we are living in am I teaching my daughters to be different, to be kind and modest and honest and chaste? Am I making sure that my daughters know that the clothes they wear are advertising the kind of person they are? Also, even though Bug is only four and right now her obsession is Jake and the Neverland Pirates how am I going to handle it when she is old enough to be into the next "Hannah Montana" how am I going to help her see the bad behavior of her idol as bad behavior and not an example to follow?

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Posted in Design Post Date 06/26/2018






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